Soo.....

I am obviously really bad at keeping this thing up.

I have been struggling with mental health issues.

I have been rethinking what I want out of my life.

I decided this blog has run it's course. I have other places I post. I have other places to put my pictures and videos. No one seems to be interested in what I have done, or what I want to do.

But this blog has been my thing for 11 years. I started it when I graduated from college and was at a loss. It has helped me document my life in a way nothing else can.

So I have decided to abandon this site, but leave it up. Weebly does not allow you to export your blog posts. They say it is thier proprietary property. 11 years worth of cut paste does not appeal to me either. I have a ton of other things to do.

So I will leave it up as long as I can so I can come back and look at things when I want to...when I need to. Since I can't just store it on my computer. So dumb.

I am working on getting an actual website together. And I have my Ko-Fi shop up still. (www.ko-fi.com/teaweasel). I want to figure out a sustainable way to sell my art. I want to create audiobooks and videos. I will be doing both on whatever website platform is easiest to work with.

But this is an end of an era. Sad.

So I am now elbow deep into the Aardman masterclass. I am enjoying myself a ton. It is rough, but I am learning a lot. The whole point is to stretch myself and learn how to be a better animator. That is not comfortable. Growth is rarely comfortable. :) I am still figuring out how to fit in full time work, taking care of a sick doggo, personal stuff and the class. Because I live in a townhouse with no yard and only a small portable washing machine, this has been hard. Cleaning takes forever. Trying to get doggo to where he can go outside when he is having a digestive emergency is hard. It frequently has resulted in the need for deep cleaning. Unfortunately. I am guilty of tossing an area rug instead of trying to clean it. Just cause I was already taking hours to wash bedding (mine) multiple times, clothes, towels, etc. At least I have the portable washer, and don't have to haul it all to a laundromat. I love my doggo. Really I do. This just emphasizes how much I need to find a house with a yard. If there was a yard I could just open the back door for him to run through, instead of trying to attach a leash to an already distressed doggo in time to open the front door and get to the pet area. Add to that servers going down at work necessitating long working hours, and there is not a ton of time, energy or brainpower left to apply to class. I am hoping I can regroup and get on top of everything this week. Doggo seems to have calmed a bit. Servers are running. I still haven't caught up on sleep, but things are loosening up a bit so I can figure out a schedule that will allow me to do everything I need and want to do.

Anyway...

As I don't really have much right now, and I do want to try to be better at keeping up this blog, I thought I would do a deeper dive into my experiments with Cosclay.



Cosclay is a rubberized polymer clay, similar to Sculpy. The biggest difference being that after it has been baked, it is pliable though no longer sculptable.



I first heard about it when the YouTuber Ace of Clay used it on one of his sculptures. He uses it when he has a lot of thin bits that stick out and are in danger of breaking if he uses the regular Sculpy. He demonstrated how much the pieces can bend after baking. He also was successful painting it after baking it.

So it got me thinking...I wonder how hard it would be to use in animation puppets. I did some googling, and really no one has any opinions on it. No one really had a searchable post on them testing it for this purpose. Someone asked in a stop motion forum about it, and was shot down by a lot of people who haven't tried it. that just seemed...inaccurate at best.

But Cosclay, though worth the expense if it works, is kind of spendy to just buy as an experiment. I was waffling about whether or not I should try it...whether it was worth it to me to have clay I may not be able to use.

Then another YouTuber tried it for sculpting. And he loved it. And when he decided to do a set of art boxes, he decided to include a small batch of it in the sculpture box. There were other things included in the sculpture box I wanted, so I decided to get that and if the Cosclay worked I would buy more to use for animation puppets.

This was just a rought hand, to see how well it animated. It is not in proportion to anything. I used 18 gague aluminum wire to rough out fingers and palm, then sculpted the clay over it. Not too difficult. Then I played with animating it. It was really not bad for animating. Here is my test sequence...

So then THAT got me thinking. Can I make a character puppet completely out of Cosclay? I was and am pretty sure a full 12 inch puppet would not work very well. Not a whole Wallace from Wallace and Grommet...though maybe, if the clay is layered on thin. So I decided to start with something simple...an earthworm.

The first iteration turned out being way too thick. While it is bendable, it does not easily stay where I put it. I just bent an 18 gage wire in half, twisted it with my hand crank drill and covered it with cosclay. This one also baked just fine in the toaster oven. Also took paint really well.

So back to the drawingboard. I redesigned the worm to be thinner and longer. And a little bit more realistic, though still cartoonish. The thinner worm worked great! Fully articulated. Stays in the pose I place it in. I even textured it a bit by putting a thread on my handy helper and rolling the worm over it down the length of the worm. That worked way better than I expected as well.

So...conclusion? I LOVE LOVE LOVE this stuff! In my opinion it works great for stop motion animation puppets, with the caveate that you need to be choosy about where you use it and how thick you build up the clay.

Also...I am currently making replacement hands out of Cosclay for my Wade puppet. My plan is to play around with him and see how well it goes. Have several more twisted wire humanoid puppets in process, and if I can figure out how to make it work well with Wade I will use the same technique with them.

Well.

This has been a dark and crazy year. I have lost people. I have gained people. Things went from bad to worse, while also wierdly getting better at the same time. My job is going well. I now have an income that sustains me. Covid in my state has increased sharply, enough our governer has closed down the state again for at least 2 weeks. As a person in the at risk catergory, this is kind of scary.

Amidst this scary time, I sat back an evaluated my life and where I am. Who am I? Where have I come from? Do I like who I am? When I am on my deathbed (whether it be next month, next year, 10 years from now or 30 years from now), will I be able to feel satisfied. Or will I feel regret.

I came to the conclusion I want to be able to look back and see 3 things. I did more good than harm. I loved more than I hated. And I broke away from my fear and did what made me joyful.

I realized I really do love stop motion animation. A lot. It makes me happy while I am struggling to mold it to what I want. It makes me laugh when I watch a clip back and see my little jokes in action. Even if I am the only one who thinks they are funny, it tickles me to death. I wrote and animated the damn thing, and I still laugh when I watch the Dalek one and see him put the sign on the Daleks back. :D Honestly, it also warms my heart to remember showing that at the 50 year Doctor Who do here in Portland, and listening to the ENTIRE AUDIENCE laugh spontaneously where I do. And later in the day, hearing a kid walking past with a presumed parent retelling the story of the Dalek knocking over Stonehenge in my video, having issues because they were laughing so hard they couldn't finish a sentance. I want others to enjoy what I do too. Not think it is good, or give me accolades....just...enjoy it for what it is.

Of course, I want to be better. I want to learn more. I am now in a financial place where I can up my game technically. So as an addition to that, I applied for the Stop Motion 1 program put on by Aardman, the people who do Wallace and Grommet, etc. I have always wanted to do a program with them, but they were all on prem in Bristol UK, which along with the tuition fees and time required to be in the country, has always put it out of reach for me. I don't even have a passport. But one good thing this horrid pandemic has done is brought that program online, and the class fees lower to a point I can afford it.

I got an email yesterday that they have accepted me. Now, I don't know if this means they are taking everyone, or if they looked at my YouTubes and video pages and decided I desperately need the help. Or if they see potential. And I felt something I did not expect. After the elation, I immediately started in to trepidation. My brain first said they aren't really serious about teaching people, they are just trying to get money and will take everyone who will pay money. As a consequence you will get no instruction, or if you have issues instead of getting help you will be chastised for not being able to figure it out yourself. Yup...I went to college for IT training with a bunch of guys, some teachers, who didn't feel I belonged there. I talked myself out of that, then immediately my brain fell back on the good old "you aren't really good enough. Why are you going to put yourself out there, and putting yourself in debt to do it?"

I am still calming my brain down from that one. But seriously.....All the reasons I outlined earlier in this post.....

Life is too short to hide from what brings you joy.

Not everything you expend money on needs to bring a financial return.

Once more for the people in the back

Not everything you expend money on needs to bring a financial return.


If I do actually get better, get some good pointers, etc GREAT. It will help me do better, express my weirdness better, help entertain people better. And bring me even more joy.

But even if I don't....I can go to my grave (whenever that is) knowing I pursued what made me happy. I am helping people I know with bills. I am buying from small businesses to help them keep afloat during this hard time. I am paying for online comedy shows and concerts, even if I can't make them, to help those who need it. I am contributing to go fund me's. I am throwing bits at Twitch streamers. I am complimenting people genuinely every chance I get.

And I am pursuing my happiness.

End of story.

That seems to be my Modus operandi. Sigh.


Ah well. I started  a new job, which has taken a lot of my time, and dealing with doggo. A couple of weeks ago he was attacked by another neighborhood dog. :/ I don't have a yard so I have to walk him in order to get him exercise and provide him the room to poop. The neighborhood dog was on a leash, but no one was holding it. Froggy had his butt planted on the sidewalk, cause I told him no and he HATES it when I tell him no. The other dog came up to him, sniffed his nose, then chomped his face and tried dragging him away. It only ended when I kicked the other doggo in the chest which made him let go and run away. I was glad I had on my steel toed construction boots. Froggy was not even really fighting back, just trying to get out of the bite. He had punctures in his face, and they scratched his remaining eye. I was sooo piassed off. There is a reason you keep your dog on a leash and in control, even if they are "a good dog" who will listen. Cause they don't always, and when something like this happens is not the time to find out when they will decide to ignore you. Fortunately he is ok, though he has scars on his snout now. And I am nervous to take him anywhere.

I have 4 things I have been working on. The first thing is armor for mr doggo. I decided he needed an helmet and armor set. I decided on 2......a Corinthian helmet with lorica Squamata armor to strap to his back, with a little tshirt underneath. Next is a Norman helmet and norse tunic. This is as far as I have gotten on that one.....

Next is little disks to put in the valves in my mask. I love the look, but those valves on the sides allow droplet to get out, which defeats the purpose of wearing a mask. So I glued down the rubber piece that was the functioning part of the valve, and made several plastic disks I can change out at will. I need to concentrate my decorations further out to the edges of the disks. Otherwise I love how they are turning out.

Next....I have always been a sucker for pretty pens. I saw a glass dip pen online, and decided I had to play around with one. So I got 5. :/ Yeah. I am worse than my mother sometimes. At least they averaged $2 each. The ink that came with them are crap, so I went to Blicks and got some good quality color calligraphy inks. I LOVE THEM SOOOO MUCH! So smooth. The green one had a chip in the tip. Which makes me sad. When I use the unchipped edge it is the best one. I am looking for someone in the area who does lampwork glass who might be able to help me fix it.

Also...have I mentioned I have a problem? I....am...a musical instrument whore. I want them all. I want to learn how to play all the instruments. I gave in last week and ordered this lyre. It is a 16 string, modeled loosely off greek and middle eastern lyres. It is in G modal, which means it goes from G as the lowest note to A as the highest note string, with no sharps or flats in the bunch. It sounds divine! Now that the strings are fully stretched and I have prcticed a bit, I can play 4 songs so far. Searching for Lambs, Usheg Veg Ruy, Fear A Bhata and Ma Navu. It is sooo fun...and addicting....and I can handle it even when my joints are not cooperating. It took me a while to wrap my head around how it works. You anchor and steady it with your left hand, and play the melody and chords with the right hand simultaneously. Hard, but fun. Eventually I will get better at it....I hope.

So there ya go. I am so scattered. I have project ADD, I swear. I still haven't gotten all my sewing projects done. I have apparently moved on, though I will eventually go back to them all.

I will leave you with one of my favorite pics I have taken lately. Last week when I got to work, there was a litte tree frog hanging out top of the card reader. Such a cutie!

Hope your quarentine is going better than you imagined.

So amidst the covid19 novel coronavirus close down scare, we have mid March snow. 😟 Here in Portland we generally don’t get snow, much less in mid March. I decided to take a walk out in it and do some photogging. After going through the 150 pics I got, there are about 40ish I am going to post and edit. Despite being dang cold out there, it is pretty. My kitteh was meowing desperately to go outside. Here is an excerpt from my personal FB:

It is still coming down out there. Da kitteh was at the door meowing hard, then winding herself around my ankles and going back to the door. She thought she wanted to go outside. So I threw on some shoes and a sweater, picked her up and took her outside. Everytime snow landed ln her head she shook her ears. I let her put her front paws in the snow… More on the patio table. Her nose was twitching so hard. I then let her sniff the snow on the fence railing. She stopped struggling to get away and kind of snuggled in to me. When I brought her back inside, she ran away from the door, stopped, looked at it, then sauntered over to the sofa and curled up. She does not want to go outside any more. 🙂

I wish I got pics of her in the snow.

​Anyway, until I have the energy to edit them, here are 2 that are my favorite out of the bunch.

Hello again. I am back again with more resolve to post here more often. Life has been kicking my butt. However I have renewed motivation and plan to try to keep this thing going. In order for that to happen, I have made a plan. Bwuahahaha.
So...

Plan 1 - Post here 2x a week, no matter where I am at.
I am hoping by making myself stick to a pre planned schedule, things won’t fall through the cracks. I have several SCA events to get ready for this summer, as well as Norwescon in April (if it isn’t cancelled) and Rose City Comic Con in September. I also have some stop mo’s I want to complete. They are all written, I just have to construct the puppets, sets, props etc and film. Hwat I work on will be dependent on time, energy, joint flare ups and money for the pieces I need.

Plan 2 - Post a vlog on You Tube either once a week or every other week.
I set up a YouTube channel for bloggy things that are not actual stop mo things. I will embed the videos here. We shall see how that goes.

For now, let me get you caught up.

I have so many projects. I think I will just list them here and break them down into the different parts.

1. SCA
I am going to just concentrate on getting a set of camping event garbs to wear to events this summer. This is going to consist of
-Elizabethan peasant garb
-1 or 2 chemises
-2 or 3 kirtles
​-an apron
-2 or 3 coifs with forehead kercheifs
-a tie on collared partlet
- Possibly either a flat cap, straw hat or both

Elizabethan peasant garb seems fairly straight forward. I am basing my basic design on this:

Basically the blue one. I don’t want to mess with back lacing while camping alone. This is also slightly earlier than my period, but it is the basic jist of what I am going for. I also want to make fake padded braids to wear under the coif to make it fit right. Cause my hair is sparce at the moment.


2. Cosplays
I want to get Talleg done (yes, STILL), and I need to fix Aoifa. I am thinking of just leaving it at those. Because I don’t have a lot of spare money right now, and Norwescon is in a month, I am just going to concentrate and those two for now.

Aoifa
-Fix her corset. Either try to make it a real corset or figure out how to sew the cardboard together so it won’t pop
-Remake her horns
-Make a padded circlet to go under the wig, so the horns look like they are growing kut of her head. Seriously that circlet is a joke.
-Figure out how to incorporate the dragon eye from the current circlet
-Sew the fur collar to the cloak. It is currently hot glued, very badly
-Repaint the spider broaches so the black doesn’t chip off
-Figure out a better sleeve configuration. Or learn how to glue them to my skin so they stay
-Figure out how to install the ears, and how to makeup them

Not much. 😒

Talleg
-Finish breastplate
-leg armor and arm armor
-Gauntlets
-Finish +1 mace.....MAKE IT LIGHT UP

​I think I will break this down futher in my video. When I get that done.